The sunlight caused the rippling waves to appear as if they were diamonds. If I hadn't known better, I probably would have gone in after them but, being as I do, I didn't. The sun's rays seemed to shoot out of the sky in every direction, as if the sun were modeling his glorious halo for all of us to see. Yes, I would find it plausible to say it was a beautiful morning.
It's a shame I couldn't say that every morning in the preceding years but thanks to some old fashion therapy I look at life in a new light or should I say in light.
I came from my darkness almost a decade ago after learning I was a manic-depressive. This is medically defined as one who falls in and out of random states of depression. I laugh to myself when I think about how long it took everybody else to figure this little fact out. I've known since I was twelve. I kind of figured it out after three tries at attempted suicide on my own behalf. At the age of fourteen, I was zero for five and getting more absorbed within myself by the day. My father thought of it as just a teenager going through puberty. He said my hormones were in a rage, but that was my mother. My psychiatrist thought that she was the one coming for therapy, 'I wonder why?'
As I think back on those years, I feel relieved. I'm glad that I found someone who loved me enough to say so. That turned out to be my husband, Khalid. I met him my junior year of high school. At first, we were only friends but then our relationship began to change. We grew closer and I tried to grow farther away. He wanted us to spend more time together and I didn't want for us to get that close but we started spending more time together anyway. The more time we spent together the more I thought. I thought about whether or not he really liked me and why. I thought about so many things that my head began to feel like it was going to explode. Eventually, I stopped eating entirely and I began shedding pounds by the inches. Besides the weight I was racking up migraine headaches by the aspirin. I counted them by how many aspirins I ended up taking to get rid of them. I was up to eight aspirins and two hours of sleep and I couldn't get rid of damn near one of them. Khalid picked up on my bad habit and began to take control of the situation.
He took me to see the school nurse and guidance counselor. Those were his first steps to showing how much he really loved me and I took mine by accepting his help. These steps led me to where I am today. I'm almost fully recovered from my depression, very happy, and an absolutely new person. My self-esteem classes had to be the best thing that helped to get this far. I learned so many things. The ones I remember most are:
I live by these now and I teach my children, Reyna and Khalid Jr. how to live by them as well. Neither of my children has shown signs of being a depressive and it makes me happy to see them laugh. It even makes me feel better when I laugh with them.